Welcome to our collection of quotes (with shareable picture quotes) by Bill Cosby. We hope you enjoy pondering them and that you will share them widely.
Wikipedia Summary for Bill Cosby
William Henry Cosby Jr. (born July 12, 1937) is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and author who held an active career for over six decades before being convicted of a number of sex offenses in 2018.
Cosby began his career as a stand-up comic at the hungry i in San Francisco during the 1960s. He then landed a starring role in the television show I Spy, followed by his own sitcom The Bill Cosby Show, which ran for two seasons from 1969 to 1971. In 1972, using the Fat Albert character developed during his stand-up routines, Cosby created, produced, and hosted the animated comedy television series Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids which ran until 1985, centering on a group of young friends growing up in an urban area. Throughout the 1970s, Cosby starred in about half a dozen films, and he occasionally returned to film later in his career. In 1976, he earned his Doctor of Education from the University of Massachusetts Amherst. His dissertation discussed the use of Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids as a teaching tool in elementary schools.
Beginning in the 1980s, Cosby produced and starred in the television sitcom The Cosby Show, which aired from 1984 to 1992 and was rated as the number one show in America from 1985 through 1989. The sitcom highlighted the experiences and growth of an affluent African-American family. Cosby produced the spin-off sitcom A Different World, which aired from 1987 to 1993. He also starred in The Cosby Mysteries from 1994 to 1995 and in the sitcom Cosby from 1996 to 2000 and hosted Kids Say the Darndest Things from 1998 to 2000.
In the mid-2010s, numerous women made sexual assault accusations against Cosby, the earliest dating back to 1965. More than 60 women have accused him of either attempted sexual assault, rape, drug-facilitated sexual assault, sexual battery, child sexual abuse, or sexual misconduct, all of which he has denied, and the statute of limitations had by the mid-2010s expired in nearly all cases. Cosby was found guilty of three counts of aggravated indecent assault and sentenced to three to ten years in prison in September 2018. He is currently incarcerated at the State Correctional Institution – Phoenix in Pennsylvania.
If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a 50 percent chance of being right.
Even though your kids will consistently do the exact
opposite of what you're telling them to do,
you have to keep loving them just as much.
A word to the wise ain't necessary. It's the stupid ones who need the advice.
Our greatest glory is not in ever failing, but in rising every time we fail.
Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair and the first thing they grab is an iron hook.
If you know two languages, the level of your intelligence
is multiplied a hundredfold in other people's eyes.
I'm a Christian. But Muslims are misunderstood. Intentionally misunderstood. We should all be more like them.
We are all anxious to be accepted. But if you have a strong mother and father who tell you that you don't have to dress a crazy way, or hang out with people who are looking for trouble in order to be loved and accepted, then half the battle is over.
There are times my stories become -- what I feel -- not only accessible to hearing me on television, but they make wonderful reading.
I am not afraid of crashing, my secret is ... just before we hit the ground, I jump as high as I can.
In Genesis, it is stated God walked on Earth. He was there on the level. After watching human behavior, he ascended having had enough of us and decided to watch over us instead.
What best defines a child is the total inability to receive information from anything not plugged in.
You also notice that the right side of your face feels like it's sliding off of your skull. And your bottom lip is in your lap!
Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His kids.
If you want to be seen, stand up. If you want to be heard, speak up. If you want to be appreciated, shut up.
If you're a parent, the five worst words you can say to your children are, When I was your age ... You were never their age. You were older in the womb.
Anyone who has brought up children knows that consistency has absolutely nothing to do with discipline.
I recently turned fifty, which is young for a tree, mid-life for an elephant, and ancient for a quarter-miler, whose son now says, Dad, I just can't run the quarter with you anymore, unless I bring something to read.
Comedy Central is what these young people are viewing. The network speaks to their audience, which is saying, 'Give me fast jokes. Give me party stories and party language.'
Tons of comedians have said, 'I grew up learning from Bill Cosby. He's great.' But that respect doesn't mean much to the young people. They like their ginger ale with hot sauce.
Fatherhood is helping your children learn English as a foreign language.
Because for me it is almost analgesic to talk about what the white man is doing against us. And it keeps a person frozen in their seat, it keeps you frozen in your hole you're sitting in.
We are the only animals that let our kids come back home.
Give me 200 active 2-year-olds and I could conquer the world.
We parents ask dumb questions, therefore we get dumb answers.
You can't be everything to everyone.
People say God will find a way. God can't find a way if you're in the way.
I'm going out... because I deserve to go out! And I'm going to get drunk... because I deserve to get drunk! And get out of my way!
You are not going to 'go forth.' You are going to take that damn hat off and you're going to get a job.
My mother comes in my room and says, Just look at this mess! This is a pig sty! Now, I've already been in the room five hours, and she wants me to LOOK at it.
Meadowlark and I share a common vision of bringing joy and laughter to others.
And so the dentist says 'Rinse.' So you lean over, and you're lookin' at this miniature toilet bowl.
You can not make everybody happy.
The measure ov overexposure is not how many times people see you on TV or in the bookstores. It's whether you can maintain the quality of your entertainment. If you can, people will always be glad to see you.
These people marched and were hit in the face with rocks to get an education and now we've got these knuckleheads walking round.
You'll have many, many friends, but if your relationship with your mate is one hundred per cent of your heart, you'll never need a friend.
In my old neighborhood, a boy stopped playing when he began to lose his pulse. And then he became the referee.
Well, I really don't know what the secret of success is but I can tell you that the secret of failure is to try to please everyone.
With my wife Camille's help, I took to social networking. I'm working with the computers.
There are no absolutes in raising children. In any stressful situation, fathering is always a roll of the dice. The game may be messy, but I have never found one with more joys and rewards.
Pay off your student loan. Even if you don't have a job...Because when you finally get a job you're going to be one of us.
The three ingredients of a successful union between two ... humor, commitment and undying love.
Today's parents grew up with the silly notion that music was meant to be heard.
The weatherman is always right. It's just his timing that's off.
You go and you buy a lottery ticket. You've got just as much chance of getting struck by lightning as you do of winning the lottery.
Most fathers and... Mothers. Only your grandmother and Ghengis Khan know how to do it.
In America ... the seven ages of man have become preschooler, Pepsi generation, baby boomer, mid-lifer, empty-nester, senior citizen, and organ donor.
There should be marches in every neighborhood every day telling the people about the negativity of drugs and how the drugs help us to behave negatively.
In your 50s, time becomes precious and must not be wasted. Every minute is an excellent opportunity for a good nap. Happy 50th birthday!
Among the guitarists, Wes Montgomery is fantastic. He's always good to let you know what the art form is all about. It's the same still life that everybody is painting, but in comes Wes Montgomery, and it's right there!
Some authority on parenting once said, Hold them very close and then let them go. This is the hardest truth for a father to learn: that his children are continuously growing up and moving away from him (until, of course, they move back in).
It is not a matter of who is rejecting me, as much as it is somebody may get it, and I am going to keep plowing through it because in this world of education, there is a harvest.
Repeat after me. I promise not to run outside of the house. I promise not to run inside of the house. I promise not to touch, pick up, step on, anything that looks interesting.
I was a physical education major with a child psychology minor at Temple, which means if you ask me a question about a child's behavior, I will advise you to tell the child to take a lap.
I did not want to turn to playing golf because golf is about as much exercise as shuffling cards.
The problems with kids having short attention spans is driven by entertainment, reset buttons on games, games having to do with getting somewhere and heads blowing up. Everything is 'cut to the chase, cut to the chase.'
My grandfather said, When you become senile, you won't know it.
'Don't worry about senility,' my grandfather used to say.
You people are not prepared. You are well educated and you look cute, but that's not going to cut it.
On many young actors that don't give their parents proper credit: I'm still waiting for some actor to win, say, an Oscar... and deliver the following acceptance speech: I would like to thank my parents, first of all, for letting me live.
Ours is a youth culture, and like a golf tournament, we honor only low scores.
Fatherhood is telling your daughter that Michael Jackson loves all his fans, but has special feelings for the ones who eat broccoli.
I love it when mothers get so mad they can't remember your name. Come here, Roy, er, Rupert, er, Rutabaga... what is your name, boy? And don't lie to me, because you live here, and I'll find out who you are.
The heart of marriage is memories.
Longer Version:
The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.
It is a warning, Godspeed. It means you are no longer welcome here at these prices.
Criticizing is easy, art is difficult.
Violence won't solve a thing. It makes it more challenging to solve, though.
Don't let your victories go to your head, or your failures go to your heart.
Any husband who says, My wife and I are completely equal partners, is talking about either a law firm or a hand of bridge.
Never forget that the devil is there 24 7 too. He's very, very busy.
We cannot afford to settle for being just average; we must learn as much as we can to be the best that we can. The key word is education -- education with maximum effort. Without it, we cannot be in charge of ourselves or anyone else.
I'm not the boss of my house. I don't know how I lost it, I don't know when I lost it, I don't really think I ever had it. But I've seen the boss's job...and I don't want it!
Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you're pouring, or drinking.
It's more blessed to give than to receive -- especially kittens.
My eleven year old daughter mopes around the house all day waiting for her breasts to grow.
Fathers are the geniuses of the house because only a person as intelligent as we could fake such stupidity.
Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.
Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers.
Longer Version:
Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.
I managed my life to the point that at age 19 I was still in high school. I decided I was too old to be walking down those hallways.
Nobody asked you to flip burgers for the rest of your life.
I love cake. I love pie. I love potato chips. I love salt. I do not want yogurt, plain yogurt. It's healthy. 'Why don't you like it?' Because it tastes like bad breath.
There should be more on television that uplifts people and shows them how to better prepare themselves for earning a living.
Longer Version:
There should be more on television that uplifts people and shows them how to better prepare themselves for earning a living. There still aren't enough people that say "this should not be." We just let it go. We need to raise a loud voice about our fellow human beings.
God has not made anything that I know of that pays so much attention to who their father and mother is as us.
We've got too many young girls, who don't know how to parent, turning themselves into parents.
I've always heard about people having a conniption, but I've never seen one.
There are two sides to every story, and sometimes three, four, and five.
George Booth and I are both funny, and from afar, without meeting, admired each other's work.
I see Obama as Sisyphus in the first four years. And nobody would speak about the size of the rock, or the elevation of the hill. All you hear people talk about is what he didn't do.
Too many people are waiting for Jesus to come along and cut your grass. And Jesus isn't going to come along and cut your grass.
You come to my comedy show to be entertained.
The absolute truth is that there is no power in celebrity.
You don't know what you're going to fall in love with until you're exposed to it.