photo of Douglas AdamsPhoto Credit: WikiMedia Commons

Quotes by Douglas Adams (Page 2 of 2)

Quote: After a while he played with the pencil and the paper again and was delighted when he discovered how to make a mark with the one on the other. Various noises continued outside, but he didn't know whether they were real or not. He then talked to his table for a week to see how it would react. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote: After a while he played with the pencil and the paper again and was delighted when he discovered how to make a mark with the one on the other. Various noises continued outside, but he didn't know whether they were real or not. He then talked to his table for a week to see how it would react.- black text on quotes background

After a while he played with the pencil and the paper again and was delighted when he discovered how to make a mark with the one on the other. Various noises continued outside, but he didn't know whether they were real or not. He then talked to his table for a week to see how it would react.


Quote: You turn the computer into the storyteller and the player into the audience, like in the old days when the storyteller would actually respond to the audience, rather than just having the audience respond to the storyteller. I had an enormous amount of fun, actually, working on that. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote: You turn the computer into the storyteller and the player into the audience, like in the old days when the storyteller would actually respond to the audience, rather than just having the audience respond to the storyteller. I had an enormous amount of fun, actually, working on that.- black text on quotes background

You turn the computer into the storyteller and the player into the audience, like in the old days when the storyteller would actually respond to the audience, rather than just having the audience respond to the storyteller. I had an enormous amount of fun, actually, working on that.




Quote: What god would be hanging around Terminal Two of Heathrow Airport trying to catch the 15:37 flight to Oslo? by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

What god would be hanging around Terminal Two of Heathrow Airport trying to catch the 15:37 flight to Oslo?


Quote: Every country is like a particular type of person. America is like a belligerent, adolescent boy, Canada is like an intelligent, 35 year old woman. Australia is like Jack Nicholson. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Every country is like a particular type of person. America is like a belligerent, adolescent boy, Canada is like an intelligent, 35 year old woman. Australia is like Jack Nicholson.


Quote: The reason why so many sects hang around airports looking for converts: they know that people there are at their most vulnerable and perplexed, and ready to accept any kind of guidance. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The reason why so many sects hang around airports looking for converts: they know that people there are at their most vulnerable and perplexed, and ready to accept any kind of guidance.


Quote: Stotting is jumping upward with all four legs simultaneously. My advice: do not die until you've seen a large black poodle stotting in the snow. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Stotting is jumping upward with all four legs simultaneously. My advice: do not die until you've seen a large black poodle stotting in the snow.


Quote: If there's any real truth, it's that the entire multidimensional infinity of the Universe is almost certainly being run by a bunch of maniacs. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

If there's any real truth, it's that the entire multidimensional infinity of the Universe is almost certainly being run by a bunch of maniacs.




Quote: Arthur felt happy. He was terribly pleased that the day was for once working out so much according to plan. Only twenty minutes ago he had decided he would go mad, and now here he was already chasing a Chesterfield sofa across the fields of prehistoric Earth. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Arthur felt happy. He was terribly pleased that the day was for once working out so much according to plan. Only twenty minutes ago he had decided he would go mad, and now here he was already chasing a Chesterfield sofa across the fields of prehistoric Earth.


Quote: The Universe, as has been observed before, is an unsettlingly big place, a fact which for the sake of a quiet life most people tend to ignore. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The Universe, as has been observed before, is an unsettlingly big place, a fact which for the sake of a quiet life most people tend to ignore.


Quote: The great thing about being the only species that makes a distiction between right and wrong is that we can make up the rules for ourselves as we go along. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The great thing about being the only species that makes a distiction between right and wrong is that we can make up the rules for ourselves as we go along.


Quote: The moment at which two people, approaching from opposite ends of a long passageway, recognize each other and immediately pretend they haven t. This is to avoid the ghastly embarrassment of having to continue recognizing each other the whole length of the corridor. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote; white text on black background

The moment at which two people, approaching from opposite ends of a long passageway, recognize each other and immediately pretend they haven t. This is to avoid the ghastly embarrassment of having to continue recognizing each other the whole length of the corridor.


Quote: Can't stand all these poisonous creatures, all these snakes and insects and fish and things. Wretched things, biting everybody. And then people expect me to tell them what to do about it. I'll tell them what to do. Don't get bitten in the first place. (quoting Dr. Struan Sutherland). by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote: Can't stand all these poisonous creatures, all these snakes and insects and fish and things. Wretched things, biting everybody. And then people expect me to tell them what to do about it. I'll tell them what to do. Don't get bitten in the first place. (quoting Dr. Struan Sutherland).- black text on quotes background

Can't stand all these poisonous creatures, all these snakes and insects and fish and things. Wretched things, biting everybody. And then people expect me to tell them what to do about it. I'll tell them what to do. Don't get bitten in the first place. (quoting Dr. Struan Sutherland).


Quote: 'Oh dear,' says God, 'I hadn't thought of that,' and promptly vanishes in a puff of logic. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

'Oh dear,' says God, 'I hadn't thought of that,' and promptly vanishes in a puff of logic.








Quote: The air was stifling, but he liked it because it was stifling city air, full of excitingly unpleasant smells, dangerous music, and the distant sound of warring police tribes. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The air was stifling, but he liked it because it was stifling city air, full of excitingly unpleasant smells, dangerous music, and the distant sound of warring police tribes.


Quote: The bird that would soar above the plain of tradition and prejudice must have strong wings. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The bird that would soar above the plain of tradition and prejudice must have strong wings.


Quote: I love to keep poking and prodding at it. I've thought about it so much over the years that that fascination is bound to spill over into my writing. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I love to keep poking and prodding at it. I've thought about it so much over the years that that fascination is bound to spill over into my writing.


Quote: Fifteen years was a long time to be stranded anywhere, particularly somewhere as mind-boggingly dull as Earth. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Fifteen years was a long time to be stranded anywhere, particularly somewhere as mind-boggingly dull as Earth.


Quote: Do you find coming to terms with the mindless tedium of it all presents an interesting challenge? by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Do you find coming to terms with the mindless tedium of it all presents an interesting challenge?


Quote: The world is a thing of utter inordinate complexity and richness and strangeness that is absolutely awesome. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The world is a thing of utter inordinate complexity and richness and strangeness that is absolutely awesome.


Quote: Any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still know where his towel is is clearly a man to be reckoned with. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still know where his towel is is clearly a man to be reckoned with.




Quote: Don't spin your wheels and stress. Take a deep breath, center yourself and make a plan. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Don't spin your wheels and stress. Take a deep breath, center yourself and make a plan.


Quote: Would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now? by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?


Quote: The Saab seethed off into the night. Arthur watched it go, as stunned as a man might be who, having believed himself to be totally blind for five years, suddenly discovers that he had merely been wearing too large a hat. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The Saab seethed off into the night. Arthur watched it go, as stunned as a man might be who, having believed himself to be totally blind for five years, suddenly discovers that he had merely been wearing too large a hat.


Quote: The difference between us and a computer is that, the computer is blindingly stupid, but it is capable of being stupid many, many million times a second. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The difference between us and a computer is that, the computer is blindingly stupid, but it is capable of being stupid many, many million times a second.




Quote: The teacher usually learns more than the pupils. Isn't that true? It would be hard to learn much less than my pupils, came a low growl from somewhere on the table, without undergoing a pre-frontal lobotomy. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The teacher usually learns more than the pupils. Isn't that true? It would be hard to learn much less than my pupils, came a low growl from somewhere on the table, without undergoing a pre-frontal lobotomy.


Quote: Zaphod Beeblebrox, adventurer, ex-hippie, good-timer (crook? quite possibly), manic self-publicist, terrible bad at personal relationships, often thought to be completely out to lunch. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Zaphod Beeblebrox, adventurer, ex-hippie, good-timer (crook? quite possibly), manic self-publicist, terrible bad at personal relationships, often thought to be completely out to lunch.


Quote: Beppu (n.) The triumphant slamming shut of a book after reading the final page. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Beppu (n.) The triumphant slamming shut of a book after reading the final page.


Quote: Books are sharks... because sharks have been around for a very long time. There were sharks before there were dinosaurs, and the reason sharks are still in the ocean is that nothing is better at being a shark than a shark. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Books are sharks... because sharks have been around for a very long time. There were sharks before there were dinosaurs, and the reason sharks are still in the ocean is that nothing is better at being a shark than a shark.


Quote: The last ever dolphin message was misinterpreted as a surprisingly sophisticated attempt to do a double-backwards-somersault through a hoop whilst whistling the 'Star Spangled Banner', but in fact the message was this: So long and thanks for all the fish. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The last ever dolphin message was misinterpreted as a surprisingly sophisticated attempt to do a double-backwards-somersault through a hoop whilst whistling the 'Star Spangled Banner', but in fact the message was this: So long and thanks for all the fish.




Quote: Ok, he said, I don't like to disturb you at what I know must be a difficult and distressing time for you, but I need to know first of all if you actually realize that this is a difficult and distressing time for you. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Ok, he said, I don't like to disturb you at what I know must be a difficult and distressing time for you, but I need to know first of all if you actually realize that this is a difficult and distressing time for you.


Quote: And the renewed shock had nearly made him spill his drink. He drained it quickly before anything serious happened to it. He then had another quick one to follow the first one down and check that it was all right. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

And the renewed shock had nearly made him spill his drink. He drained it quickly before anything serious happened to it. He then had another quick one to follow the first one down and check that it was all right.


Quote: Humans are not proud of their ancestors, and rarely invite them round to dinner. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Humans are not proud of their ancestors, and rarely invite them round to dinner.


Quote: He dreamed at one point in his slumbers of New York. In his dream he was walking late at night along the East Side, beside the river which had become so extravagantly polluted that new lifeforms were now emerging from it spontaneously, demanding welfare and voting rights. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote; white text on black background

He dreamed at one point in his slumbers of New York. In his dream he was walking late at night along the East Side, beside the river which had become so extravagantly polluted that new lifeforms were now emerging from it spontaneously, demanding welfare and voting rights.


Quote: Same as you, Arthur. I hitched a ride. After all, with a degree in maths and another in astrophysics it was either that or back to the dole queue on Monday. Sorry I missed the Wednesday lunch date, but I was in a black hole all morning. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Same as you, Arthur. I hitched a ride. After all, with a degree in maths and another in astrophysics it was either that or back to the dole queue on Monday. Sorry I missed the Wednesday lunch date, but I was in a black hole all morning.


Quote: Zaphod marched quickly down the passageway, nervous as hell, but trying to hide it by striding purposefully. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Zaphod marched quickly down the passageway, nervous as hell, but trying to hide it by striding purposefully.


Quote: A magician wandered along the beach, but no one needed him. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

A magician wandered along the beach, but no one needed him.


Quote: God's Final Message to His Creation:
'We apologize for the inconvenience.' by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

God's Final Message to His Creation:
'We apologize for the inconvenience.'


Quote: Perhaps I'm old and tired, but I always think that the chances of finding out what really is going on are so absurdly remote that the only thing to do is to say hang the sense of it and just keep yourself occupied. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Perhaps I'm old and tired, but I always think that the chances of finding out what really is going on are so absurdly remote that the only thing to do is to say hang the sense of it and just keep yourself occupied.


Quote: The more Susan waited, the more the doorbell didn't ring. Or the phone. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The more Susan waited, the more the doorbell didn't ring. Or the phone.


Quote: A fragrant breeze wandered up from the quiet sea, trailed along the beach, and drifted back to the sea again, wondering where to go next. On a mad impulse it went up to the beach again. It drifted back to sea. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

A fragrant breeze wandered up from the quiet sea, trailed along the beach, and drifted back to the sea again, wondering where to go next. On a mad impulse it went up to the beach again. It drifted back to sea.




Quote: In the center lay the exploded carcass of a lonely sperm whale that hadn't lived long enough to be disappointed with its lot. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

In the center lay the exploded carcass of a lonely sperm whale that hadn't lived long enough to be disappointed with its lot.




Quote: I don't believe there's a horse in your bathroom. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I don't believe there's a horse in your bathroom.


Quote: Having not said anything the first time, it was somehow even more difficult to broach the subject the second time around. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Having not said anything the first time, it was somehow even more difficult to broach the subject the second time around.


Quote: If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.


Quote: Let's think the unthinkable, let's do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Let's think the unthinkable, let's do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.


Quote: Reality is frequently inaccurate. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Reality is frequently inaccurate.


Quote: On the delivery plate of the Nutri-Matic Drink Synthesizer was a small tray, on which say three bone china cups and saucers, a bone china jug of milk, a silver teapot full of the best tea Arthur had ever tasted and a small printed note saying Wait. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

On the delivery plate of the Nutri-Matic Drink Synthesizer was a small tray, on which say three bone china cups and saucers, a bone china jug of milk, a silver teapot full of the best tea Arthur had ever tasted and a small printed note saying Wait.


Quote: Arthur blinked at the screens and felt he was missing something important. Suddenly he realized what it was.
Is there any tea on this spaceship? he asked. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Arthur blinked at the screens and felt he was missing something important. Suddenly he realized what it was.
Is there any tea on this spaceship? he asked.


Quote: A cup of tea would restore my normality. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

A cup of tea would restore my normality.


Quote: The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.


Quote: I've had the sort of day that would make St. Francis of Assisi kick babies. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I've had the sort of day that would make St. Francis of Assisi kick babies.


Quote: If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a non-working cat. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a non-working cat.


Quote: Why can't people just learn to live together in peace and harmony? said Arthur.
Ford gave a loud, very hollow laugh.
Forty-two! he said with a malicious grin. No, doesn't work. Never mind. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Why can't people just learn to live together in peace and harmony? said Arthur.
Ford gave a loud, very hollow laugh.
Forty-two! he said with a malicious grin. No, doesn't work. Never mind.


Quote: He stood up straight and looked the world squarely in the fields and hills. To add weight to his words he stuck the rabbit bone in his hair. He spread his arm out wide. I will go mad! he annouced. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

He stood up straight and looked the world squarely in the fields and hills. To add weight to his words he stuck the rabbit bone in his hair. He spread his arm out wide. I will go mad! he annouced.


Quote: Laser light flickered all over him as if he was a packet of biscuits at a super-market check-out. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Laser light flickered all over him as if he was a packet of biscuits at a super-market check-out.


Quote: But while nature has considerable resilience, there is a limit to how far that resilience can be stretched. No one knows how close to the limit we are getting. The darker it gets, the faster we're driving. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

But while nature has considerable resilience, there is a limit to how far that resilience can be stretched. No one knows how close to the limit we are getting. The darker it gets, the faster we're driving.


Quote: Structural linguistics is a bitterly divided and unhappy profession, and a large number of its practitioners spend many nights drowning their sorrows in Ouisghian Zodahs. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Structural linguistics is a bitterly divided and unhappy profession, and a large number of its practitioners spend many nights drowning their sorrows in Ouisghian Zodahs.


Quote: First we thought the PC was a calculator. Then we found out how to turn numbers into letters with ASCII -- and we thought it was a typewriter. Then we discovered graphics, and we thought it was a television. With the World Wide Web, we've realized it's a brochure. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

First we thought the PC was a calculator. Then we found out how to turn numbers into letters with ASCII -- and we thought it was a typewriter. Then we discovered graphics, and we thought it was a television. With the World Wide Web, we've realized it's a brochure.


Quote: Technology is a word that describes something that doesn't work yet. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Technology is a word that describes something that doesn't work yet.


Quote: We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works.

Longer Version/[Notes]:

We are stuck with technology when all we really want is just stuff that works. How do you recognize something that is still technology? A good clue is if it comes with a manual.


Quote: We find our images of what we call evil in things outside ourselves, in creatures that know nothing of such matters, so that we can feel revolted by them, and, by contrast, good about ourselves. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

We find our images of what we call evil in things outside ourselves, in creatures that know nothing of such matters, so that we can feel revolted by them, and, by contrast, good about ourselves.


Quote: Rather than arriving five hours late and flustered, it would be better all around if he were to arrive five hours and a few extra minutes late, but triumphantly in command. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Rather than arriving five hours late and flustered, it would be better all around if he were to arrive five hours and a few extra minutes late, but triumphantly in command.


Quote: There are some people you like immediately, some whom you think you might learn to like in the fullness of time, and some that you simply want to push away from you with a sharp stick. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

There are some people you like immediately, some whom you think you might learn to like in the fullness of time, and some that you simply want to push away from you with a sharp stick.


Quote: We can't win against obsession. They care, we don't. They win. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

We can't win against obsession. They care, we don't. They win.


Quote: The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well, on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well, on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.


Quote: The truth of the matter is, that most English people don't know how to make tea anymore either, and most people drink cheap instant coffee instead, which is a pity, and gives Americans the impression that the English are just generally clueless about hot stimulants. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote; white text on black background

The truth of the matter is, that most English people don't know how to make tea anymore either, and most people drink cheap instant coffee instead, which is a pity, and gives Americans the impression that the English are just generally clueless about hot stimulants.


Quote: The seat received him in a loose and distant kind of way, like an aunt who disapproves of the last fifteen years of your life and will therefore furnish you with a basic sherry, but refuses to catch your eye. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The seat received him in a loose and distant kind of way, like an aunt who disapproves of the last fifteen years of your life and will therefore furnish you with a basic sherry, but refuses to catch your eye.


Quote: Alltami (n.) The ancient art of being able to balance the hot and cold shower taps. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Alltami (n.) The ancient art of being able to balance the hot and cold shower taps.


Quote: The Guide says there is an art to flying, said Ford, or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The Guide says there is an art to flying, said Ford, or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.




Quote: The quality of any advice anybody has to offer has to be judged against the quality of life they actually lead. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The quality of any advice anybody has to offer has to be judged against the quality of life they actually lead.


Quote: 'You're a jerk,' repeated the alien, 'a complete asshole.' by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

'You're a jerk,' repeated the alien, 'a complete asshole.'




Quote: All opinions are not equal. Some are a very great deal more robust, sophisticated and well supported in logic and argument than others. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

All opinions are not equal. Some are a very great deal more robust, sophisticated and well supported in logic and argument than others.


Quote: He suddenly exploded in a flurry of arms and legs, out of which flew a ball. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

He suddenly exploded in a flurry of arms and legs, out of which flew a ball.


Quote: I love deadlines. I like the whooshing noise they make as they go by. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing noise they make as they go by.


Quote: The last thing he wanted after a hellish night like this one was some blasted day coming along and barging about the place. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The last thing he wanted after a hellish night like this one was some blasted day coming along and barging about the place.


Quote: The simple truth is that interstellar distances will not fit into the human imagination. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The simple truth is that interstellar distances will not fit into the human imagination.


Quote: Earth: mostly harmless. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Earth: mostly harmless.




Quote: Now the world has gone to bed, Darkness won't engulf my head, I can see by infrared, How I hate the night. Now I lay me down to sleep, Try to count electric sheep, Sweet dream wishes you can keep, How I hate the night. -Marvin. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Now the world has gone to bed, Darkness won't engulf my head, I can see by infrared, How I hate the night. Now I lay me down to sleep, Try to count electric sheep, Sweet dream wishes you can keep, How I hate the night. -Marvin.


Quote: Alone of all the races on earth, they seem to be free from the 'Grass is Greener on the other side of the fence' syndrome, and roundly proclaim that Australia is, in fact, the other side of that fence. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Alone of all the races on earth, they seem to be free from the 'Grass is Greener on the other side of the fence' syndrome, and roundly proclaim that Australia is, in fact, the other side of that fence.


Quote: Mark Carwardine's role, essentially, was to be the one who knew what he was talking about. My role, and one for which I was entirely qualified, was to be an extremely ignorant non-zoologist to whom everything that happened would come as a complete surprise. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Mark Carwardine's role, essentially, was to be the one who knew what he was talking about. My role, and one for which I was entirely qualified, was to be an extremely ignorant non-zoologist to whom everything that happened would come as a complete surprise.


Quote: I come in peace...Take me to your lizard. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I come in peace...Take me to your lizard.


Quote: Fiordland, a vast tract of mountainous terrain that occupies the south-west corner of South Island, New Zealand, is one of the most astounding pieces of land anywhere on God's earth, and one's first impulse, standing on a cliff top surveying it all, is simply to burst into spontaneous applause. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote: Fiordland, a vast tract of mountainous terrain that occupies the south-west corner of South Island, New Zealand, is one of the most astounding pieces of land anywhere on God's earth, and one's first impulse, standing on a cliff top surveying it all, is simply to burst into spontaneous applause.- black text on quotes background

Fiordland, a vast tract of mountainous terrain that occupies the south-west corner of South Island, New Zealand, is one of the most astounding pieces of land anywhere on God's earth, and one's first impulse, standing on a cliff top surveying it all, is simply to burst into spontaneous applause.


Quote: Unfortunately this Electric Monk had developed a fault, and had started to believe all kinds of things, more or less at random. It was even beginning to believe things they'd have difficulty believing in Salt Lake City. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Unfortunately this Electric Monk had developed a fault, and had started to believe all kinds of things, more or less at random. It was even beginning to believe things they'd have difficulty believing in Salt Lake City.


Quote: 2,000 years ago one man got nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be if everyone was nice to each other for a change. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

2,000 years ago one man got nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be if everyone was nice to each other for a change.


Quote: What's so unpleasant about being drunk?
Ask a glass of water! by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

What's so unpleasant about being drunk?
Ask a glass of water!


Quote: This planet has -- or rather had -- a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much all of the time. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

This planet has -- or rather had -- a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much all of the time.




Quote: We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty! by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!


Quote: You can't dodge your responsibilities by saying they don't exist! by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

You can't dodge your responsibilities by saying they don't exist!




Quote: Humans think they are smarter than dolphins because we build cars and buildings and start wars etc., and all that dolphins do is swim in the water, eat fish and play around. Dolphins believe that they are smarter for exactly the same reasons. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Humans think they are smarter than dolphins because we build cars and buildings and start wars etc., and all that dolphins do is swim in the water, eat fish and play around. Dolphins believe that they are smarter for exactly the same reasons.


Quote: Beethoven tells you what it's like to be Beethoven and Mozart tells you what it's like to be human. Bach tells you what it's like to be the universe. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Beethoven tells you what it's like to be Beethoven and Mozart tells you what it's like to be human. Bach tells you what it's like to be the universe.


Quote: He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.


Quote: Don't you understand that we need to be childish in order to understand? Only a child sees things with perfect clarity, because it hasn't developed all those filters which prevent us from seeing things that we don't expect to see. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Don't you understand that we need to be childish in order to understand? Only a child sees things with perfect clarity, because it hasn't developed all those filters which prevent us from seeing things that we don't expect to see.


Quote: Fenchurch had red mullet and said it was delicious.
Arthur had a swordfish steak and said it made him angry. He grabbed a passing waitress by the arm and berated her.
Why's this fish so bloody good? he demanded, angrily. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Fenchurch had red mullet and said it was delicious.
Arthur had a swordfish steak and said it made him angry. He grabbed a passing waitress by the arm and berated her.
Why's this fish so bloody good? he demanded, angrily.


Quote: There's always a moment when you start to fall out of love, whether it's with a person or an idea or a cause, even if it's one you only narrate to yourself years after the event: a tiny thing, a wrong word, a false note, which means that things can never be quite the same again. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote; white text on black background

There's always a moment when you start to fall out of love, whether it's with a person or an idea or a cause, even if it's one you only narrate to yourself years after the event: a tiny thing, a wrong word, a false note, which means that things can never be quite the same again.


Quote: Don't believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Don't believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose.


Quote: I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.

Longer Version/[Notes]:

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.


Quote: Just believe everything I tell you, and it will all be very, very simple.
Ah, well, I'm not sure I believe that. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Just believe everything I tell you, and it will all be very, very simple.
Ah, well, I'm not sure I believe that.


Quote: We are now cruising at a level of two to the power of twenty-five thousand to one against and falling, and we will be restoring normality just as soon as we are sure what is normal anyway. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

We are now cruising at a level of two to the power of twenty-five thousand to one against and falling, and we will be restoring normality just as soon as we are sure what is normal anyway.


Quote: It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end.


Quote: Space is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist, but that's just peanuts to space. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Space is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist, but that's just peanuts to space.


Quote: To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem.


Quote: He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher… or, as his wife would have it, an idiot. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher… or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.


Quote: I'd far rather be happy than right any day. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I'd far rather be happy than right any day.


Quote: People wanted me to do a CD-ROM of 'Hitchhiker's,' and I thought, 'No, no.' I didn't want to just sort of reverse-engineer yet another thing from a book I'd already written. I think that the digital media are interesting enough in their own right to be worth originating something in. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote: People wanted me to do a CD-ROM of 'Hitchhiker's,' and I thought, 'No, no.' I didn't want to just sort of reverse-engineer yet another thing from a book I'd already written. I think that the digital media are interesting enough in their own right to be worth originating something in.- black text on quotes background

People wanted me to do a CD-ROM of 'Hitchhiker's,' and I thought, 'No, no.' I didn't want to just sort of reverse-engineer yet another thing from a book I'd already written. I think that the digital media are interesting enough in their own right to be worth originating something in.


Quote: Wandering around the web is like living in a world in which every doorway is actually one of those science fiction devices which deposit you in a completely different part of the world when you walk through them. In fact, it isn't like it, it is it. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Wandering around the web is like living in a world in which every doorway is actually one of those science fiction devices which deposit you in a completely different part of the world when you walk through them. In fact, it isn't like it, it is it.


Quote: If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.


Quote: Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.


Quote: You live and learn. At any rate, you live. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

You live and learn. At any rate, you live.


Quote: Life is wasted on the living. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Life is wasted on the living.


Quote: I was the only kid who anybody I knew has ever seen actually walk into a lamppost with his eyes wide open. Everybody assumed that there must be something going on inside, because there sure as hell wasn't anything going on the outside! by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I was the only kid who anybody I knew has ever seen actually walk into a lamppost with his eyes wide open. Everybody assumed that there must be something going on inside, because there sure as hell wasn't anything going on the outside!






Quote: Years and years ago, I did a game based on 'Hitchhiker's Guide' with a company called Infocom, which was a great company. They were doing witty, intelligent, literate games based on text. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Years and years ago, I did a game based on 'Hitchhiker's Guide' with a company called Infocom, which was a great company. They were doing witty, intelligent, literate games based on text.


Quote: I think that the digital media are interesting enough in their own right to be worth originating something in. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I think that the digital media are interesting enough in their own right to be worth originating something in.


Quote: I wanted to be a writer-performer like the Pythons. In fact, I wanted to be John Cleese, and it took me some time to realise that the job was, in fact, taken. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I wanted to be a writer-performer like the Pythons. In fact, I wanted to be John Cleese, and it took me some time to realise that the job was, in fact, taken.


Quote: I don't think anybody would argue now that the Internet isn't becoming a major factor in our lives. However, it's very new to us. Newsreaders still feel it is worth a special and rather worrying mention if, for instance, a crime was planned by people 'over the Internet.' by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote; white text on black background

I don't think anybody would argue now that the Internet isn't becoming a major factor in our lives. However, it's very new to us. Newsreaders still feel it is worth a special and rather worrying mention if, for instance, a crime was planned by people 'over the Internet.'


Quote: When you write your first book aged 25 or so, you have 25 years of experience, albeit much of it juvenile experience. The second book comes after an extra year sitting in bookshops. Pretty soon, you begin to run on empty. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

When you write your first book aged 25 or so, you have 25 years of experience, albeit much of it juvenile experience. The second book comes after an extra year sitting in bookshops. Pretty soon, you begin to run on empty.


Quote: I used to be a great fan of doing crosswords. When you're fiddling around with anagrams, you get wonderful jumbles of syllables that become interesting. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I used to be a great fan of doing crosswords. When you're fiddling around with anagrams, you get wonderful jumbles of syllables that become interesting.


Quote: Working out the social politics of who you can trust and why is, quite literally, what a very large part of our brain has evolved to do. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Working out the social politics of who you can trust and why is, quite literally, what a very large part of our brain has evolved to do.


Quote: I find the whole business of religion profoundly interesting. But it does mystify me that otherwise intelligent people take it seriously. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I find the whole business of religion profoundly interesting. But it does mystify me that otherwise intelligent people take it seriously.


Quote: The usual method of finding a little dongly thing that actually matches a gizmo I want to use is to go and buy another one, at a price that can physically drive the air from your body. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The usual method of finding a little dongly thing that actually matches a gizmo I want to use is to go and buy another one, at a price that can physically drive the air from your body.


Quote: As a child, I was an active Christian. I used to love the school choir and remember the carol service as always such an emotional thing. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

As a child, I was an active Christian. I used to love the school choir and remember the carol service as always such an emotional thing.


Quote: I find the difference, for me, between having no money and having quite a bit is that the bills get bigger. And that's it. The lifestyle doesn't change. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I find the difference, for me, between having no money and having quite a bit is that the bills get bigger. And that's it. The lifestyle doesn't change.


Quote: It is a rare mind indeed that can render the hitherto non-existent blindingly obvious. The cry 'I could have thought of that' is a very popular and misleading one, for the fact is that they didn't, and a very significant and revealing fact it is too. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

It is a rare mind indeed that can render the hitherto non-existent blindingly obvious. The cry 'I could have thought of that' is a very popular and misleading one, for the fact is that they didn't, and a very significant and revealing fact it is too.


Quote: After ten years of word processing, I can't even do hand writing anymore. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

After ten years of word processing, I can't even do hand writing anymore.


Quote: I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it.


Quote: I've been trying to... Having been an English literary graduate, I've been trying to avoid the idea of doing art ever since. I think the idea of art kills creativity. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I've been trying to... Having been an English literary graduate, I've been trying to avoid the idea of doing art ever since. I think the idea of art kills creativity.


Quote: I briefly did therapy, but after a while, I realised it is just like a farmer complaining about the weather. You can't fix the weather -- you just have to get on with it. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I briefly did therapy, but after a while, I realised it is just like a farmer complaining about the weather. You can't fix the weather -- you just have to get on with it.


Quote: Hundreds of people who've never written before send in 'Dr. Who' scripts. They may have good ideas, but what they fail to realise is that writing for TV is incredibly complicated. They have no idea how difficult it is and what the financial commitment is. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Hundreds of people who've never written before send in 'Dr. Who' scripts. They may have good ideas, but what they fail to realise is that writing for TV is incredibly complicated. They have no idea how difficult it is and what the financial commitment is.


Quote: He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.


Quote: What the computer in virtual reality enables us to do is to recalibrate ourselves so that we can start seeing those pieces of information that are invisible to us but have become important for us to understand. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

What the computer in virtual reality enables us to do is to recalibrate ourselves so that we can start seeing those pieces of information that are invisible to us but have become important for us to understand.


Quote: There is a piece of me that likes to fondly imagine my maverick and rebellious nature. But, more accurately, I like to have a nice and cosy institution that I can rub up against a little bit. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

There is a piece of me that likes to fondly imagine my maverick and rebellious nature. But, more accurately, I like to have a nice and cosy institution that I can rub up against a little bit.


Quote: Of course you can't 'trust' what people tell you on the web anymore than you can 'trust' what people tell you on megaphones, postcards or in restaurants. Working out the social politics of who you can trust and why is, quite literally, what a very large part of our brain has evolved to do. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote: Of course you can't 'trust' what people tell you on the web anymore than you can 'trust' what people tell you on megaphones, postcards or in restaurants. Working out the social politics of who you can trust and why is, quite literally, what a very large part of our brain has evolved to do.- black text on quotes background

Of course you can't 'trust' what people tell you on the web anymore than you can 'trust' what people tell you on megaphones, postcards or in restaurants. Working out the social politics of who you can trust and why is, quite literally, what a very large part of our brain has evolved to do.


Quote: If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.


Quote: It is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it... anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

It is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it... anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.


Quote: The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at and repair. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at and repair.


Quote: Cyberspace is -- or can be -- a good, friendly and egalitarian place to meet. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Cyberspace is -- or can be -- a good, friendly and egalitarian place to meet.


Quote: The difficulty with this conversation is that it's very different from most of the ones I've had of late. Which, as I explained, have mostly been with trees. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The difficulty with this conversation is that it's very different from most of the ones I've had of late. Which, as I explained, have mostly been with trees.


Quote: There's nothing worse than sitting down to write a novel and saying, 'Well, okay, I'm going to do something of high artistic worth.' by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

There's nothing worse than sitting down to write a novel and saying, 'Well, okay, I'm going to do something of high artistic worth.'


Quote: In order to fly, all one must do is simply miss the ground. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

In order to fly, all one must do is simply miss the ground.


Quote: Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.


Quote: For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.


Quote: It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.


Quote: Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the drug store, but that's just peanuts to space. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the drug store, but that's just peanuts to space.


Quote: I taught myself to play the guitar by listening to Paul Simon records, working it out note by note. He is an incredibly intelligent musician. He's not someone who has a natural outpouring of melody like McCartney or Dylan, who are just terribly prolific with musical ideas. by author Douglas Adams overlaid on photo of Douglas Adams quote; white text on black background

I taught myself to play the guitar by listening to Paul Simon records, working it out note by note. He is an incredibly intelligent musician. He's not someone who has a natural outpouring of melody like McCartney or Dylan, who are just terribly prolific with musical ideas.


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