photo of Douglas AdamsPhoto Credit: WikiMedia Commons
quote by Douglas Adams: If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Let's think the unthinkable, let's do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Let's think the unthinkable, let's do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Reality is frequently inaccurate. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Reality is frequently inaccurate.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: Arthur blinked at the screens and felt he was missing something important. Suddenly he realized what it was.
Is there any tea on this spaceship? he asked. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Arthur blinked at the screens and felt he was missing something important. Suddenly he realized what it was.
Is there any tea on this spaceship? he asked.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: A cup of tea would restore my normality. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

A cup of tea would restore my normality.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I've had the sort of day that would make St. Francis of Assisi kick babies. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I've had the sort of day that would make St. Francis of Assisi kick babies.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a non-working cat. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a non-working cat.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: Why can't people just learn to live together in peace and harmony? said Arthur.
Ford gave a loud, very hollow laugh.
Forty-two! he said with a malicious grin. No, doesn't work. Never mind. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Why can't people just learn to live together in peace and harmony? said Arthur.
Ford gave a loud, very hollow laugh.
Forty-two! he said with a malicious grin. No, doesn't work. Never mind.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: He stood up straight and looked the world squarely in the fields and hills. To add weight to his words he stuck the rabbit bone in his hair. He spread his arm out wide. I will go mad! he annouced. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

He stood up straight and looked the world squarely in the fields and hills. To add weight to his words he stuck the rabbit bone in his hair. He spread his arm out wide. I will go mad! he annouced.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: Laser light flickered all over him as if he was a packet of biscuits at a super-market check-out. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Laser light flickered all over him as if he was a packet of biscuits at a super-market check-out.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: But while nature has considerable resilience, there is a limit to how far that resilience can be stretched. No one knows how close to the limit we are getting. The darker it gets, the faster we're dr… with background image: white tulips with green leaves
Background Photo: Kilimanjaro STUDIOz

But while nature has considerable resilience, there is a limit to how far that resilience can be stretched. No one knows how close to the limit we are getting. The darker it gets, the faster we're driving.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Structural linguistics is a bitterly divided and unhappy profession, and a large number of its practitioners spend many nights drowning their sorrows in Ouisghian Zodahs. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Structural linguistics is a bitterly divided and unhappy profession, and a large number of its practitioners spend many nights drowning their sorrows in Ouisghian Zodahs.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: Technology is a word that describes something that doesn't work yet. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Technology is a word that describes something that doesn't work yet.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works.

--Douglas Adams

Longer Version:

We are stuck with technology when all we really want is just stuff that works. How do you recognize something that is still technology? A good clue is if it comes with a manual.


quote by Douglas Adams: We find our images of what we call evil in things outside ourselves, in creatures that know nothing of such matters, so that we can feel revolted by them, and, by contrast, good about ourselves. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

We find our images of what we call evil in things outside ourselves, in creatures that know nothing of such matters, so that we can feel revolted by them, and, by contrast, good about ourselves.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Rather than arriving five hours late and flustered, it would be better all around if he were to arrive five hours and a few extra minutes late, but triumphantly in command. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Rather than arriving five hours late and flustered, it would be better all around if he were to arrive five hours and a few extra minutes late, but triumphantly in command.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: There are some people you like immediately, some whom you think you might learn to like in the fullness of time, and some that you simply want to push away from you with a sharp stick. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

There are some people you like immediately, some whom you think you might learn to like in the fullness of time, and some that you simply want to push away from you with a sharp stick.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: We can't win against obsession. They care, we don't. They win. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

We can't win against obsession. They care, we don't. They win.

--Douglas Adams


quote by Douglas Adams: The seat received him in a loose and distant kind of way, like an aunt who disapproves of the last fifteen years of your life and will therefore furnish you with a basic sherry, but refuses to catch … with background image: backdrop
Background Photo: Tina Dawson

The seat received him in a loose and distant kind of way, like an aunt who disapproves of the last fifteen years of your life and will therefore furnish you with a basic sherry, but refuses to catch your eye.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Alltami (n.) The ancient art of being able to balance the hot and cold shower taps. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Alltami (n.) The ancient art of being able to balance the hot and cold shower taps.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: The Guide says there is an art to flying, said Ford, or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The Guide says there is an art to flying, said Ford, or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: The quality of any advice anybody has to offer has to be judged against the quality of life they actually lead. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The quality of any advice anybody has to offer has to be judged against the quality of life they actually lead.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: 'You're a jerk,' repeated the alien, 'a complete asshole.' with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

'You're a jerk,' repeated the alien, 'a complete asshole.'

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: All opinions are not equal. Some are a very great deal more robust, sophisticated and well supported in logic and argument than others. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

All opinions are not equal. Some are a very great deal more robust, sophisticated and well supported in logic and argument than others.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: He suddenly exploded in a flurry of arms and legs, out of which flew a ball. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

He suddenly exploded in a flurry of arms and legs, out of which flew a ball.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I love deadlines. I like the whooshing noise they make as they go by. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing noise they make as they go by.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: The last thing he wanted after a hellish night like this one was some blasted day coming along and barging about the place. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The last thing he wanted after a hellish night like this one was some blasted day coming along and barging about the place.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: The simple truth is that interstellar distances will not fit into the human imagination. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The simple truth is that interstellar distances will not fit into the human imagination.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Earth: mostly harmless. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Earth: mostly harmless.

--Douglas Adams


quote by Douglas Adams: Alone of all the races on earth, they seem to be free from the 'Grass is Greener on the other side of the fence' syndrome, and roundly proclaim that Australia is, in fact, the other side of that fenc… with background image: brown wallpaper
Background Photo: Suganth

Alone of all the races on earth, they seem to be free from the 'Grass is Greener on the other side of the fence' syndrome, and roundly proclaim that Australia is, in fact, the other side of that fence.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: I come in peace...Take me to your lizard. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I come in peace...Take me to your lizard.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: Unfortunately this Electric Monk had developed a fault, and had started to believe all kinds of things, more or less at random. It was even beginning to believe things they'd have difficulty believin… with background image: two boy's walking on green grass field
Background Photo: Kevin Gent

Unfortunately this Electric Monk had developed a fault, and had started to believe all kinds of things, more or less at random. It was even beginning to believe things they'd have difficulty believing in Salt Lake City.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: 2,000 years ago one man got nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be if everyone was nice to each other for a change. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

2,000 years ago one man got nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be if everyone was nice to each other for a change.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: What's so unpleasant about being drunk?
Ask a glass of water! with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

What's so unpleasant about being drunk?
Ask a glass of water!

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: This planet has -- or rather had -- a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much all of the time. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

This planet has -- or rather had -- a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much all of the time.

--Douglas Adams


quote by Douglas Adams: We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty! with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: You can't dodge your responsibilities by saying they don't exist! with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

You can't dodge your responsibilities by saying they don't exist!

--Douglas Adams




quote by Douglas Adams: Beethoven tells you what it's like to be Beethoven and Mozart tells you what it's like to be human. Bach tells you what it's like to be the universe. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Beethoven tells you what it's like to be Beethoven and Mozart tells you what it's like to be human. Bach tells you what it's like to be the universe.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: Fenchurch had red mullet and said it was delicious.
Arthur had a swordfish steak and said it made him angry. He grabbed a passing waitress by the arm and berated her.
Why's this fish so bloody good? … with background image: high-angle photography of beach side
Background Photo: Syd Sujuaan

Fenchurch had red mullet and said it was delicious.
Arthur had a swordfish steak and said it made him angry. He grabbed a passing waitress by the arm and berated her.
Why's this fish so bloody good? he demanded, angrily.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: There is no problem so complicated that you can't find a very simple answer to it if you look at it right. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

There is no problem so complicated that you can't find a very simple answer to it if you look at it right.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Don't believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Don't believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.

--Douglas Adams

Longer Version:

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.


quote by Douglas Adams: Just believe everything I tell you, and it will all be very, very simple.
Ah, well, I'm not sure I believe that. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Just believe everything I tell you, and it will all be very, very simple.
Ah, well, I'm not sure I believe that.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: We are now cruising at a level of two to the power of twenty-five thousand to one against and falling, and we will be restoring normality just as soon as we are sure what is normal anyway. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

We are now cruising at a level of two to the power of twenty-five thousand to one against and falling, and we will be restoring normality just as soon as we are sure what is normal anyway.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before -- and thus was the Empire forged. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before -- and thus was the Empire forged.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Space is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist, but that's just peanuts to space. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Space is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist, but that's just peanuts to space.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher… or, as his wife would have it, an idiot. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher… or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I'd far rather be happy than right any day. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I'd far rather be happy than right any day.

--Douglas Adams



quote by Douglas Adams: If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: You live and learn. At any rate, you live. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

You live and learn. At any rate, you live.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Life is wasted on the living. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Life is wasted on the living.

--Douglas Adams



quote by Douglas Adams: Years and years ago, I did a game based on 'Hitchhiker's Guide' with a company called Infocom, which was a great company. They were doing witty, intelligent, literate games based on text. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Years and years ago, I did a game based on 'Hitchhiker's Guide' with a company called Infocom, which was a great company. They were doing witty, intelligent, literate games based on text.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I think that the digital media are interesting enough in their own right to be worth originating something in. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I think that the digital media are interesting enough in their own right to be worth originating something in.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I wanted to be a writer-performer like the Pythons. In fact, I wanted to be John Cleese, and it took me some time to realise that the job was, in fact, taken. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I wanted to be a writer-performer like the Pythons. In fact, I wanted to be John Cleese, and it took me some time to realise that the job was, in fact, taken.

--Douglas Adams


quote by Douglas Adams: I used to be a great fan of doing crosswords. When you're fiddling around with anagrams, you get wonderful jumbles of syllables that become interesting. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I used to be a great fan of doing crosswords. When you're fiddling around with anagrams, you get wonderful jumbles of syllables that become interesting.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: Working out the social politics of who you can trust and why is, quite literally, what a very large part of our brain has evolved to do. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

Working out the social politics of who you can trust and why is, quite literally, what a very large part of our brain has evolved to do.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I find the whole business of religion profoundly interesting. But it does mystify me that otherwise intelligent people take it seriously. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I find the whole business of religion profoundly interesting. But it does mystify me that otherwise intelligent people take it seriously.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: The usual method of finding a little dongly thing that actually matches a gizmo I want to use is to go and buy another one, at a price that can physically drive the air from your body. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

The usual method of finding a little dongly thing that actually matches a gizmo I want to use is to go and buy another one, at a price that can physically drive the air from your body.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: As a child, I was an active Christian. I used to love the school choir and remember the carol service as always such an emotional thing. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

As a child, I was an active Christian. I used to love the school choir and remember the carol service as always such an emotional thing.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I find the difference, for me, between having no money and having quite a bit is that the bills get bigger. And that's it. The lifestyle doesn't change. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I find the difference, for me, between having no money and having quite a bit is that the bills get bigger. And that's it. The lifestyle doesn't change.

--Douglas Adams

quote by Douglas Adams: After ten years of word processing, I can't even do hand writing anymore. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

After ten years of word processing, I can't even do hand writing anymore.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I've been trying to... Having been an English literary graduate, I've been trying to avoid the idea of doing art ever since. I think the idea of art kills creativity. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I've been trying to... Having been an English literary graduate, I've been trying to avoid the idea of doing art ever since. I think the idea of art kills creativity.

--Douglas Adams
quote by Douglas Adams: I briefly did therapy, but after a while, I realised it is just like a farmer complaining about the weather. You can't fix the weather -- you just have to get on with it. with background image: photo of author Douglas Adams with quote

I briefly did therapy, but after a while, I realised it is just like a farmer complaining about the weather. You can't fix the weather -- you just have to get on with it.

--Douglas Adams

Quotes by Douglas Adams are featured in:


Art Quotes
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Simplicity Quotes
Programming Quotes

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