Welcome to our collection of quotes by Joe Rogan. We hope you enjoy pondering them and please share widely.
Joseph James Rogan (born August 11, 1967) is an American podcast host, UFC color commentator, comedian, and former television presenter.
Rogan began his career in comedy in August 1988 in the Boston area. After relocating to Los Angeles in 1994, he signed an exclusive developmental deal with Disney, and appeared as an actor on several television shows including Hardball and NewsRadio. In 1997, he started working for the Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC) as an interviewer and color commentator.
Rogan released his first comedy special, I'm Gonna Be Dead Someday ..., in 2000. From 2001 to 2006, he was the host of the game show Fear Factor. In 2009, Rogan launched his podcast The Joe Rogan Experience, which led him to increased success and podcast superstardom.
I never want to compromise my act just to get a laugh.
There are only two reasons to hate gay marriage. Either you're dumb, or you're secretly worried that dicks are delicious.
The number one reason why marijuana is illegal is because the Pharma Cartel does not want you to grow your own medicine.
The number one reason why marijuana is illegal is because the Pharma Cartel does not want you to grow your own medicine. The Declaration of Independence was written on hemp paper. The first car ever made ran on hemp oil. Hemp seeds are also the healthiest food on the planet with the highest protein content out of any plant.
People say you can abuse marijuana. Well shit, you can abuse cheeseburgers too, you know? You don't go around closing Burger King because you can abuse something.
We all go through doubt. It's hard. Those difficult moments are what build your character.
One of the most fascinating lessons I've absorbed about life is that the struggle is good.
But it's hard for a chick to do comedy. It's not as open for them.
I love existing in pre big bang conditions.
There's only 2 reasons that you hate gay marriage;
1. You're dumb, or 2. You're secretly worried that dicks are delicious.
I want to talk about the nature of human beings or how we're evolving as a race.
When I started out I was definitely more traditional. It was 1988. Everyone was doing the Jerry Seinfeld.
I'm a nightclub comic. That's what I do. I work in the clubs uncensored because my mind is uncensored, and those are the thoughts that I have. I do the kind of comedy that I would enjoy seeing.
Greatness and madness are next door neighbours; and they borrow each other's sugar. You don't get there without the other.
Having the privilege of sitting down and having 3 hour long uninterrupted conversations with hundreds of brilliant people is an awesome perspective enhancer.
There's a classic story I tell about when I did the Man Show about the retarded conversations that you have with the executive producers and the network.
Omigawa is moving forward like a karate robot.
I stopped using twitter because it's like a bunch of mental patients throwing shit at each other.
People are scared man, they're scared of the void.
Imagine being a poor person and you find out that the Queen who literally does nothing is making 100 million dollars in a year.
One of the things that happened is I did a lot of shitty gigs. When you do a bunch of shitty bar gigs you have to get used to people yelling at you, you're used to thinking on the fly, to dealing with weird situations.
I always try to look at conflicts from as many different angles as is humanly possible, and in a lot of ways there is no one answer.
I think stand is better now than it's ever been. I think it's the greatest time ever to do standup comedy.
The Universe rewards calculated risk and passion.
You do what you're supposed to do, but you have to be honest about what they're doing. When you do a comedy show on a network the problem is there are going to be a bunch of people who aren't comedians that are going to tell you what's funny.
We have to start treating each other as if we are treating ourselves living another life.
Kindness is one of the best gifts you can bestow... We know that inherently that feels great.
Maybe we can combine 2 things that everybody loves. Helping out the poor and blow jobs.
I don't like people that make their living talking about bullshit, and you see them in many shows that are made on the same subject. When you go looking at UFOs or bigfoot or what-have-you, there's just nothing there.
Not all comedy clubs or situations are ideal, especially when you're first coming up and I think that's good for you. Eventually you get to express your real personality.
I think there is more comedians now than ever, more venues now than ever. There are stand-ups who live in towns where they don't have many comedy clubs where they are organizing more comedy nights in bars. I just think this is a fantastic time for stand up.
Like bees creating a beehive or ants creating an anthill we're all moving along creating something and we're not sure what it is.
You want to talk about the word faggot because it really offends you? Well you're a douchebag.
Comedy shows in D.C. are so much fun. I think because of the intense area that is connected to politics that people need, they need their down time. D.C. audiences are almost universally praised by comedians.
If the world was an etch-a-sketch, glaciers are the big shake.
Build confidence and momentum with each good decision you make from here on out and choose to be inspired.
Aspire to be the man you pretend to be when you're trying to get laid.
Haters...are all failures. It's 100% across the board. No one who is truly brilliant at anything is a hater.
Martial arts are a vehicle for developing your human potential.
The key to happiness doesn't lay in numbers in a bank account but in the way we make others feel.
Jiu-Jitsu has been one of the most valuable tools I've ever had in my life.
The people who could most benefit from the self-reflective ego-dissolving qualities of cannabis are the ones that want it to be illegal.
The mind is the most important thing of the big picture and no one has a stronger mindset than amateur wrestlers.
Someone else's success does not equal a failure for you.
Choose To Be Inspired.
If Tyson Griffin was a girl, I'd say he has a badonkadonk.
Once you understand what excellence is all about... you see how that excellence manifests itself in any discipline.
To really appreciate life you got to know you're going to die.
You're just part of the soup of the universe, so just try to enjoy what's good about it.
There's a never-ending ocean of techniques out there.
I wouldn't totally rule out doing Letterman or the Tonight Show if I had a set that I just happened to write that I thought was funny but was still appropriate for network censors. But I'm
not going to go out of my way.
I realized a long time ago that instead of being jealous you can be inspired and appreciative. It carries more energy to you.
I realized a long time ago that instead of being jealous you can be inspired and appreciative. It carries more energy to you... That can be an awesome motivating force that can improve your life if you choose to be inspired and not jealous. One (being jealous) has no benefit whatsoever, the other is an incredible resource for creating momentum and improvement.
We live in a society that makes it really easy for these pussies to get by.
Prison is for rapists, thieves, and murderers. If you lock someone up for smoking a plant that makes them happy, then you're the fucking criminal.
The sensory deprivation chamber has been the most important tool that I've ever used for developing my mind.
Most of my bits are long stream-of-consciousness- type things, and when I'm doing them onstage, other places to take the theme or idea will hit me, and I just go with it.
It's impossible to measure the type of mental strength and determination that's required to be an elite wrestler.
So many times I've done a CD, and then the week after I record it, I've got this new tagline that's killer. And it makes the whole bit better. It happens all the time. But that's just the process of comedy.
I thought eventually I'd have a family and I really didn't want to be a loser like that guy in his 40s still shopping his band's shitty demo tapes around.
I'll go to church with anyone who's willing to smoke pot and look through a telescope with me.
Teaching someone that doesn't know something forces you to think about almost every single aspect of it, including parts of it that you could sort of take for granted.
It's been one of the most important tools for me in personal growth for understanding myself, how I am, and what effect I do have on other people.
So instead of investing your time in a passion, you've sold your life to work for an uncaring machine that doesn't understand you. That's the problem with our society. And what's the reward? Go home and get a big TV.
I read the things that scientists have figured out, and apply what they say is beneficial, but at the end of the day I'm the wrong person to get unchallenged nutritional advice from.
This country has a mental health problem disguised as a gun problem, and a tyranny problem disguised as a security problem.
There's a confidence and a mental toughness that comes from the very highest level of competition, whatever the sport is. Whether it's boxing or wrestling, or whatever.
I prefer older people to college kids as audience for the most part. I want people with life experience, people that understand where I'm coming from.
If life wasn't real it would be the craziest psychedelic trip ever.
Sometimes faggot is the right word. There's a trend in this country to avoid words: We can't say that one anymore it's offensive.
On my left knee I have a long scar from an ACL operation. I've had both knees reconstructed.
The people I know that have the hardest time keeping it together emotionally are people that don't workout.
A unicorn is a donkey from the future.
I did a lot of crazy gigs man. I hosted a Jack and Jill strip club in Woonsocket Rhode Island which is this tiny depressing fishing town, all Portuguese immigrants and it's just a humorless, dark town.
One of the great things about Houston is that they police themselves. It's the way Boston was in the '80s. No hacks or thieves are tolerated in the community, and that's HUGE.
If I could, I would live in Houston, and I would encourage any comic starting out looking for a good place to develop to move there.
Houston people are way cool. They're smart, they know how to have a good time, and they have the hottest chicks on the planet there.
There's a direct correlation between positive energy and positive results.
Apartment living is tough action. Just the whole idea that you share a washer and dryer always freaked me out.
Have you ever talked to someone, and you're not even really talking to them? Actors are the worst for that.
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