If the CEO is not going to give you a fair chance, you're probably not going to win.

Once you get a reputation for emotional volatility, it can take years of model behavior to change how others see you.

When you say, 'I'm sorry,' you turn people into your allies, even your partners.

I don't get paid if my clients don't get better by a certain time period. And sure, I have not been paid before. We all fail sometimes; it's okay.

Be happy now. It's a great Western disease that we'll be happy in the future -- when we get higher status or that BMW or that promotion or this project finished. Instead, be happy now.

If we really want to make change, we have to make peace with the fact that we cannot self-exempt every time the calendar offers us a more attractive alternative.

When we prolong negative behavior -- the kind that hurts the people we love or the kind that hurts us in some way -- we are leading a changeless life in the most hazardous manner. We are willfully choosing to be miserable and making others miserable, too.

It can be more productive to help people learn to be 'right' than prove they were 'wrong.'

The people I coach are very successful people, so it's very hard for winners to not constantly win. Even if it's trivial and not worth it, we still want to win -- because we love winning. It's a very deep habit.

One of the most important actions, things a leader can do, is to lead by example. If you want everyone else to be passionate, committed, dedicated, and motivated, you go first!

Gratitude is not a limited resource, nor is it costly. It is abundant as air. We breathe it in but forget to exhale.

My job is to show my clients that their anger is rarely someone else's fault. It's their flaw.

If somebody is going in the wrong direction, behavioral coaching just helps them get there faster. It doesn't turn the wrong direction into the right direction.

Coaching works best with high potential people who are willing to make a concerted effort to change, not as a religious conversion activity.

Treat every piece of advice as a gift or a compliment and simply say, Thank you.

I was at UCLA when John Wooden was the basketball coach. The next coach was Gene Bartow, who got fired for winning 90 percent plus of his games. He wasn't John Wooden. It's incredibly difficult to replace someone who has been seen as an icon.

To me, the #1 key to success is 'creating lasting positive change in yourself and others.' That is what is most rare, most difficult, and most valuable about leading people.

Put your goals on paper, or an Excel spreadsheet. Measure every day, 'Did I do my best to...?' Your problems won't disappear, but you will exist in a different relation to them, and you will improve.

When you're at the lower levels in the organization, you need to win and be right. But as you move up, you need to let other people win and be right, and become a manager and delegate responsibility.

The best knowledge workers are working for more than money.